Gay for the stay prison

Nobody wants that. I know that I did. There’s a phrase that is often used in women’s prisons: “Gay for the stay.” When I first heard it, at Taconic Correctional Facility inI didn’t understand what it meant. I learned that it's not like they show it in movies.

My hope in sharing this is to offer a realistic snapshot to gay men who get sent to prison. Moreover, they also knew that I was gay. That last bit of information is one of the reasons why I decided to pen this piece.

The situation I found myself in was entirely of my making. From what I saw, the attitude was be and let be. 10 things I learned as a gay prisoner. FYI: there is a big difference between a camp and penitentiary. I thought as a gay man being sent to prison my life was over.

They would facilitate lesbian relationships. Finally, if you get caught fighting more than once, they can ship you off to a higher security facility. What follows are 10 things I learned from the perspective of a gay man and ex-inmate at a federal prison camp.

Even now as I write this, I can still feel a chill as I recall his words. Not even a little. I was given time to prepare and get my personal affairs in order usually days and was ordered to self-surrender on October 12, The thought of going to prison scared the living crap out of me.

Voices Comment Many prison inmates are 'gay for the stay' Staff encouragement was overt. If this goes to trial, you could be looking at a lot more time. In high security facilities, LGBT prisoners are often grouped. I was being sent to prison for five years.

This was my first time in prison, and I was a married heterosexual woman with six children. Some of the women interviewed had formed relationships with a fellow inmate; a practice so common it is known by a few names: “gate gay”; “gay for the stay”.

After long negotiations with the prosecutor, my lawyer phoned me to break the news. At my facility, there was a rundown basketball court by a shed, a quarter mile running track and a handful of crappy disney gay stars. Can I pass myself of as straight?

In the final analysis, I decided to just keep a low profile and avoid interaction. The only time I ever saw people get into fights was when someone got too nosey. Obviously, location matters so bear this in my as you read what follows.

Finally, gay inmates usually stick together. In my case, I had plea bargained down to a month sentence on a drug charge that could have carried a year sentence. “Gay for the stay” is an insensitive oversimplification that signals a lack of understanding about what it’s really like to be imprisoned, and an underestimation of human nature.

But during my first.